


Short Cuts Lead to Long Delays

by elleven_norrin



Category: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Canon - Book, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-07
Updated: 2015-12-13
Packaged: 2018-04-30 10:32:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5160503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elleven_norrin/pseuds/elleven_norrin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In Lord of the Rings Pippin says he knows the area between Woody End and the Brandywine River, and warns Frodo that taking a short cut through there will take longer.... This is a fic about how that was learned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Farmer Maggot was having an uneventful morning, just as he liked it.

“Been a whole three days since any little urchins tried stealing my mushrooms, Nipper. You getting enough exercise without troublesome hobbits to chase?”

Nipper just looked up at Farmer Maggot and wagged his tail before running off after a squirrel.

“I suppose you must be then,” Maggot chuckled to himself.

Meanwhile about a hundred feet up the lane two hobbit tweens were crawling under Farmer Maggot’s hedge. 

“Merry your skirt’s blocking my way, is it clear yet?”

“Stop crowding me Pippin, how are we supposed to make an effective entrance if you get yourself stuck in my space?”

“Jeeze you don’t have to be so grumpy about it,” Pippin mumbled as she crawled backwards toward the lane again.

Merry scanned what she could see of the horizon and saw Farmer Maggot’s dog bounding away.

“Any minute now….Ok clear!” She shot out of the hedge and into the mushroom fields, with Pippin only a millisecond behind, and then they began shoving mushrooms into their pockets as fast as possible. Pippin glanced up for a moment to check for Farmer Maggot or his dreaded dogs, but instead caught a rare glimpse of Merry’s hair released from her hat. Those curls really do shine in the sun, Pippin caught herself thinking. 

“What, you girls using your hats now? If you’re going to keep stealing my mushrooms at least come prepared with some baskets or something.”

“Farmer Maggot!” Merry and Pippin exclaimed together.

“Don’t act so surprised, I’m the one that’s supposed to be here.”

Pippin chewed her lip and looked up at Farmer Maggot through her bangs. “I’m so sorry Farmer Maggot, it’s just that, it’s my birthday and all, and Merry was out of mushrooms for my birthday quiche-“

“-Because you ate all of them yesterday!” Merry exclaimed. “And you didn’t even share them you selfish little fiend.”

Pippin’s face scrunched up and she took a step toward Merry as she said “hey watch who you’re calling selfish! You were the one that didn’t tell me you had mushrooms until yesterday!” 

Merry snorted, "yeah, because you would have eaten them all the first day you came to Buckland." 

“Alright now girls, settle it down. There’s plenty of mushrooms to go around!” 

“You mean you’ll let us keep these?” Pippin’s face lit up.

“No, I mean I’ll let you young ‘uns give those to me for elevenses-"

Pippin’s face fell.

“-Which I’ll share with you two if you pick enough mushrooms to fill up these baskets,” Farmer Maggot said, indicating two large-ish baskets in his hands.

“So I DO get mushrooms!” Pippin celebrated.

“If you can manage to work for an hour that is” Merry elbowed Pippin, “because I’m not doing your share for you _this_ time.”

“Well I’ll leave you girls to it, come in when you’ve filled those baskets and we’ll have a nice meal,” Farmer Maggot said before turning and continuing on his rounds about the fields.

“Well I guess these count towards filling the baskets then right?” asked Pippin as she emptied her pockets into the basket. 

“They do as long as you clean off that pocket lint. I have a feeling Farmer Maggot’s a little pickier than you about that stuff Pip.”

“Oh right, I suppose that’s true,” Pippin agreed as she picked through the mushrooms in her basket. She couldn’t help but notice that Merry had about twice as many in hers already. Probably because of that dumb hat trick…

Pippin tried very hard to pick enough mushrooms quickly enough to catch up to Merry, but as soon as she fell into a routine she felt the need to break it.

“Hey Merry!”

“What’s that Pip?”

“Know what we should do?”

“Besides stop stealing mushrooms and getting conscripted into labor?”

“Yeah, besides that, something way more fun!”

“I’m on the edge of my seat Pip, what could possibly be more fun than this?”

“We should go visit Frodo!”

Merry paused halfway bent over to pick a mushroom. She was about to stand up again when Pippin, who had been walking the rows behind Merry, ran straight into her and toppled her onto the ground.

“Oh! Uh… sorry about that…” Pippin said, still on top of her.

“Well if you’re sorry least you can do about it is get off of me!”

“Oh, right!” Pippin shot up.

“Uh, anyways well I mean, you did say that Frodo must be feeling lonely in that big hole all by himself and uh..”

“I was being facetious when I said that Pip, Fatty just got back from Hobbiton two days ago.”

Merry began picking up the mushrooms that had fallen out of her basket, and Pippin realized she should probably pick hers up too.

“Oh, look at these perfectly good mushrooms I just squished!” lamented Pippin as the full weight of her clumsy tragedy sank in. 

“It’s alright,” Merry piped in cheerfully, laying a hand on Pippin’s shoulder, “we’ll just keep on picking. Faster we get these baskets full the faster we can have elevenses!” 

Once again the two hobbits set to picking, but once again as the rhythm was just being established Pippin had to go and ruin it.

“He’ll be missing me though.”

“Who will?” asked Merry.

“Frodo of course!” Pippin shouted. “It’s been a full two months since I’ve seen him you know.”

“Psh,” responded Merry. “Since when does anyone miss a little rascal like you?” she asked while playfully shoving Pippin.

Pippin should have laughed playfully, but looking down Pippin noticed for the first time that the shoulder of her dress was torn. Maybe she was just a little rascal after all. Probably happened when she was rushing through the hedge, she thought. But how was she to know? Maybe she’d torn it earlier, or even torn it a different day and it’d been torn all day. Not to mention her muddied skirts and her stockings. Mum was always calling her a rascal about those sagging stockings. 

“Don’t call me a rascal, you rascal!” Pippin shouted at Merry as she threw a handful of dirt at that somehow still put together stupid face and perfect hair.

“Oi Pip! You got dirt in my hair!”

“Getting in the way of your dignified elegant almost-an-adult aesthetic is it?” Pippin asked airily, trying very hard to control the urge to pick out each tiny piece of dirt she’d just foolishly thrown into that perfect hair. 

Merry laughed and shook the dirt out of her hair before replying, with her hair sill half covering her face, “Yeah, it is actually, you minx.”

Pippin blushed and looked away. Seeing Pippin's embarassment Merry blushed too. Couldn't two friends call each other minxes anymore?

“So, uh, I guess we’d better get on with filling these baskets if we’re going to get our elevensies” Pippin eventually said.

“Right, yeah, yeah we’d better,” Merry replied.

They finished filling the baskets in silence.


	2. Chapter 2

Once they had filled the baskets with mushrooms Merry and Pippin made their way across the field to Farmer Maggot’s house and were greeted by a pleasant surprise.

“Pip, you’ve got a better nose than me. My nose isn’t lying right? Do I smell…”

“I heard a certain birthday girl wanted a mushroom quiche,” Farmer Maggot confirmed Merry’s suspicions as he entered the dining room and set the piping hot quiche on the table.

“Oh Farmer Maggot! You’re my favorite person in the world! Oh thank you so much!! Oh, you shouldn’t have!”

Merry was glad that Pippin got her quiche, but felt strangely disappointed that she hadn’t made it herself. 

“But of course I should have!” Farmer Maggot replied to Pippin as he sat down and began cutting slices for the two younger hobbits. 

“But it’s my birthday, I should be giving you something. Instead I’m just taking your mushrooms,” Pippin said as she and Merry took their seats. Pippin looked a little abashed, but only a little, so Merry wasn’t convinced the sting of embarrassment would stick and help her learn to grow up and stop stealing things from her neighbors. Merry mumbled, half to herself, “Really Farmer Maggot, you really shouldn’t have. This is why she keeps getting me into trouble, isn’t it… You’re just reinforcing this kind of behavior.”

“Nonsense, I can make you a quiche for your birthday if I want. Besides, it was no trouble at all really, the missus left this one half cooked for me while she takes the children off to see her family. She seems to think I can’t take care of myself….” Farmer Maggot trailed off and seemed to reflect fondly on his wife for a moment before coming back to the present. “Do remember to ask next time though why don’t you girls,” Farmer Maggot continued cheerily as he served Merry and Pippin their slices of quiche. “Otherwise,” he paused and narrowed his eyes at them, “Otherwise I’ll be forced to set my dogs on you.” 

Pippin’s eye’s widened and she bit her lip. Farmer Maggot had the biggest meanest dogs this side of the shire.

“Aww Pip, don’t get so scared, he’s just joking.” Merry waved away the threat and determinedly took a bite of her quiche. 

“Am I though?” Farmer Maggot asked with raised eyebrows.

Merry quickly swallowed her piece of quiche and sat up straight. “I’m not a naïve little 20-something anymore Mr. Maggot, I’m not falling for it.” Pippin’s fear was automatically forgotten as she rolled her eyes. “There she goes again. She’s been insufferable since January. Manwe help us all when she comes of age in another three years.”

Farmer Maggot laughed, and the spell of his only-half-serious threat broken, the three ate their quiche.

“Hey Merry,” Pippin said after a brief silence.

“Yeah Pip?”

“We should really throw me a birthday party!”

“Pip, your birthday’s today, that doesn’t leave any time for planning…”

“Says who!?” Pippin said emphatically as she set her fork down hard. She splattered a bit of quiche on the table and earned a reproving glance from Farmer Maggot. She at least had the decency to look sheepish as she said, “Planning’s boring anyways.”

Merry raised an eyebrow, “I mean, I hate planning too, but it’s a necessary evil for parties.”

Pippin sighed and rested her head on her hand. “Says who,” she pouted.

“Says the people who wont come because they’re already half-ways across the Shire. Why not next week?” Pippin looked despondent. “Or even tomorrow really,” Merry continued. “You’ll get a small party of our close friends at least if you wait until tomorrow.”

“I can’t do tomorrow though!” Pippin complained, “My parents get here tomorrow.”

“Oh,” Farmer Maggot interrupted, “This is the kind of party parents aren’t invited to? I don’t want to hear any more of the planning then.”

“I’m sorry Farmer Maggot, sir” Pippin apologized. “We’ll talk about something else…”

“Oh don’t worry about it dear, I’ve got to get back to the fields anyways.” Farmer Maggot cleared his dishes from the table and got up. “Just make sure you clean up the dishes before you head out!” he called over his shoulder as he went out through the kitchen.

“Yes Mr. Maggot, sir” both Hobbits called after him.

“We can still have fun with your parents here,” Merry attempted to console Pippin as they finished up their quiche.

Pippin turned a bit pink as she responded, “Yeah, sure I guess you’re right.”

“What?” Merry asked, “Your parents can’t be such killjoys can they be?”

“No, it’s not that, it’s just… I don’t know I feel like I get more freedom with just you ‘supervising’ me.”

Merry snorted as she pushed out her chair and grabbed both her and Pippin’s finished plates. “Yeah, but then you get me in a bunch of trouble.”

Pippin followed Merry into the kitchen., “hey, you’re the one that said that Maggot wouldn’t mind if we just took a few mushrooms.”

“Yeah,” Merry responded, “and youre the one who gave me those stupid sad eyes when I said I didn’t have any more mushrooms. You know I can’t say no to those.”

“What, you mean these sad eyes?” Pippin asked as her eyes widened and watered and her lower lip quivered just the tiniest bit. She looked up through her bangs at Merry.

Merry had just placed the dishes all in pre-prepared soapy dishwater and glanced over at Pippin for only a moment before trying to shield the sad eyes with her soapy hands.

“Aw don’t Pip, we’ve got dishes to finish before you distract me again.”

“But don’t you even want to hear what we’re doing next?” Pippin asked while wringing the front of her skirt with her hands as if she were nervous.

“Oh don’t give me that innocent puppy dog act, we’ve got work to do before we do ANY next thing,” Merry quipped back, trying to cover the interest she felt in Pippin’s plans.

“Aww come on,” Pippin sidled up to Merry and put her chin on Merry’s shoulder, “after all, you’re the one that told me life’s too boring if you follow the rules?”

Merry shrugged Pippin’s head off her shoulder, “I don’t know..”

Pippin splashed soapy water onto Merry playfully as she said “come on! Don’t be such a stick-in-the-mud!”

Merry scoffed at Pippin’s accusation that she was being a stick-in-the mud and grinned wickedly back at her. “I’m the stick in the mud?” she asked, “what, are you finally going to come explore the Old Forest with me?”

“Nah man, that’s boring during the day,” Pippin said dismissively.

Merry raised her eyebrows, “boring??” she asked incredulously.

“We’re going on the full moon, remember?” Pippin said lightly.

“But I thought your parents were coming to Buckland?” Merry asked.

“So we’ll sneak off,” Pippin laughed nervously, “whatever.”

Merry sighed and looked away, “your parents will think I’m a horrible influence for sure.”

“Oh don’t worry about that!” Pippin said helpfully, “they already do.”

“What? Me?” Merry was genuinely shocked.

“Well sure.” Pippin answered, confused about why Merry would care. “Why d’you think it’s only in the last couple of years we’ve been able to see each other more often than just Frodo’s birthday and your mom’s birthday?”

“That’s no fair though!” Merry exclaimed, “you’re the Took here after all.”

“So?” Pippin snorted, “It’s not like the Brandybucks are any better. ‘Sides, you’re half a Took yourself!”

“Harumph” Merry grumbled angrily.

“Eh, don’t feel so bad,” Pippin attempted to comfort Merry, “it’s more about your parents than you anywhow.”

“My parents?”

“Yeah,” Pippin said, taking a bite from her apple, “my dad reckons your mum was a huge trouble-maker. Said she was always getting him in trouble.”

Merry took a moment to process this, cleaning dishes quietly and angrily before she said, “Well it’s not like I wanted to hang out with some kid anyways.

“Hey!” Pippin exclaimed, “I’m not a kid!”

“Well not now I suppose,” Merry conceded haughtily. “You are a bit of an annoying twat of a tween though.”

“Rude!” Pippin shouted, “You realize you’re still a tween yourself?”

“For now,” Merry said, rolling her eyes. “Not too much longer though,” she continued quietly and a little regretfully.

“And,” Pippin continued, talking over Merry, “I happen to be very old for my age.” As she said this Pippin tried to discreetly puff out her chest in a way that both conveyed authority and showed off her ‘womanly figure.’”

Merry took one glance at this stance she had seen many times by now and dismissed Pippin, saying “Don’t do that Pip. You just make yourself look like even more of a little girl.”

“I’m not a little girl!!” Pippin shouted.

Merry put down the dish she’d just cleaned and turned to Pippin. “And acting like this is supposed to make me believe you?” she asked.

“Oh, you’re useless!” Pippin exclaimed as she shoved Merry out of the way and ran towards the door.

“Pip!” Merry exclaimed, “Where are you going? There are still plates to wash!”

“So do them yourself if you’re so grown up!” Pippin called back over her shoulder as she went out the back door.

“Pip!” Merry called, but Pippin was gone. And there were still dishes to wash. “Ugh what a crybaby,” Merry thought to herself as she looked at all the work Pippin had left her to do alone. She considered running after Pippin, but they were already in so much trouble already, she didn’t want to risk dogs being set on them because they’d left dirty dishes after Farmer Maggot had been kind enough to share his quiche with a couple of thieves and troublemakers. “She left all the work for me, just because I said I used to think she was just a kid?” Merry thought to herself, and as she washed the dishes she felt pretty righteously angry, but the anger wore out quickly as it always did when it came to Pippin. “Augh, I suppose I should apologize.” She thought, “now where’d that confounded Took get to?”

Assuming Pippin had gone back to the ferry, maybe even left Merry alone on the west side of the river, Merry went back there. By the time she got to the ferry it was lunch-time and she had a good scolding worked up for Pippin about how she hated missing lunch, but when she got there Pippin was nowhere in sight but the boat was still there.

“Wait… Where’d she get to then?” Merry wondered. She looked around for a while but eventually gave up and went back to Farmer Maggot’s. “Maybe she stayed there for some reason?” she speculated to herself as she turned around. She began by walking, but soon found herself running. Once at the farm she went straight back to the kitchen, as if she might find Pippin easier by going back to the last place she’d seen her. Like a misplaced sock.

“Ah, there you are Merry. I saw Pippin rushing off and I thought I’d missed the last chance to give you these!” said Farmer Maggot, presenting Merry with a basket of mushrooms. “I promised your mother just last week and hadn’t gotten around to it yet.”

“You saw Pippin leaving!?” Merry exclaimed, ignoring the mushrooms.

“From a bit of a distance you might say. But yes, I saw her leave.” Said Farmer Maggot before adding grumpily, “And I saw the mushrooms she trampled on her way what’s more.”

“trampled?” Merry asked breathlessly.

“That girl needs to learn more care,” Farmer Maggot said shaking his head disapprovingly. “Especially when cutting across someone else’s fields.”

“Wait,” said Merry in confusion, “She didn’t leave by the road then?”

“Nope,” Farmer Maggot snorted. “That’d be too easy for her I suppose. No, she looked like she was trying to cut cross country to the Woody End. I thought the two of you were on some new mad adventures. Not much else in the way of reason to try cutting through the country out there. If she’s headed anywhere in the Shire she’d be better served taking the road.”

“Oh that girl!” Merry exclaimed in annoyance before realizing, “She’s got no forest sense at all though. She’s bound to get herself lost.” And without losing another moment Merry was out the door and sprinting towards the forest.

“Be careful now!” Farmer Maggot called after Merry, “Run like that and you’ll break your neck in a bog for sure!” Merry made no sign that she’d heard. “Well I’d better go to the post office with these after all,” Farmer Maggot thought looking down at the basket of mushrooms still in his hands. “Those girls won’t beat it to Buckland at this rate.”


	3. Chapter 3

Merry cut across the fields, leaving a second path of trampled mushrooms for poor Farmer Maggot to deal with. It wasn’t until she’d leapt the stone fence at the edge of the woods, snagged her dress on the stone fence she’d tried to hurdle over, and fallen on the ground right on the other side of the fence that she stopped long enough to realize that running blindly into the forest would do nobody any good at all, she needed to find Pippin’s tracks to find her. She traced the wall, looking for the obvious path through the mushrooms that Farmer Maggot had complained about. She soon found it and saw that Pippin had been slightly more reasonable than her and had gone over the wall at a stile instead of pell-mell. Based on the tracks Merry saw Pippin hadn’t fallen like she had. Not there at least.

Merry followed the tracks into the woods; it wasn’t hard as Pippin had knocked down every loose branch in her path and left several shreds of her dress on a particularly violent blackberry bush. “Oh she’ll be in such a state,” Merry worried to herself.

The first time Merry found evidence that Pippin had fallen she gasped aloud and kept running faster, afraid she’d find Pippin bleeding and/or crying just around the next bend. The second time she slowed down instead, again expecting to see Pippin somewhere nearby, but this time worried that she might miss it if she were to run too fast. By the fourth time she saw that Pippin had fallen she had gained a new respect for Pippin’s ability to pick herself up and keep running after some foolhardy impulse. And then finally she could hear Pippin, so she stopped watching the ground so closely and missed some vital information.

Merry found herself walking nearly as quietly as an elf, suddenly worried that Pippin might be mad at her. Just over a small hill there was a creek bed, and down near the water was a distressed Pippin sitting on a log. Merry crawled down the bank and went to put her hand on Pippin’s shoulder, but then hesitated, wondering if a sign of affection like that would be welcome after Pippin ran all this way presumably to avoid her. Pippin began to cry however, so Merry sat down on the log next to her.

“What’sa matter Pip?” she asked.

Pippin jumped a tiny amount, but was too bummed out to start asking Merry where she’d come from or berate her for not giving any kind of warning. Instead she went straight to making up excuses for her tears. “Oh, uh nothing really,” she said and then sniffled, “I was just….” She filled the silence by wiping her eyes, but that just made matters worse since in one or all of her many falls in the forest she’d gotten her hands quite dirty, so that dirt when mixed with her tears made her face quite muddy. “I mean,” she continued, inspiration hitting her, “it’s just that we never had a luncheon and my second breakfast was so small it hardly counts and really its getting on to afternoon tea already and I’m starting to think I might starve.”

“A missed meal is quite the tragedy it’s true,” Merry conceded. After a moment she decided it was safe to put her arm around Pippin’s shoulder. Pippin seemed to inhale sharply, and for a millisecond Merry was worried she’d misread the social cues and that Pippin was mad at her after all, but then she decided that the inhale must have really been part of the sniffle that followed it. At the very least, Pippin made no sign that the physical contact was unwanted.

“Know what else would be a tragedy?” Merry said, thinking of an idea to get things back to normal between them, “if you fell in the creek!” she finished, pushing Pippin into the muddy water.

“Why I ougta!” Pippin exclaimed in her normal mischievious way as she made to pull Merry in after her, but then she collapsed in pain as she put her weight on her left ankle.

“Oi, Pip, you alright??” Merry asked in concern.

“Yeah, just tripped over my own two feet like a clumsy toddler is all,” said Pippin as she experimentally tried to put weight on her foot and winced in pain.

Merry wasted no time and was already in the muddy creek bed helping her friend up. “Clumsy toddler?” Merry said incredulously as she helped Pippin out of the water and back to the bank. She sat Pippin down on her log and then knelt in front of her as she said solemnly, “look at me Pip, you’re not a toddler, you’re not a little girl, and I’m sorry for calling you one.”

“You mean it?” Pippin said, half afraid to meet Merry’s eys.

“’course I mean it you ridiculous Took,” Merry said, taking Pippin’s face in her hand and meeting her gaze.

Pippin blushed and tried to maintain a light and joking tone as she said, “so you’re gonna stop putting on airs and pretending you’re fancy because you’re almost an adult and all that?”

“A Brandybuck is always fancy though!” Merry said, matching Pippin’s attempt at joking around. “But,” she added, seeing Pippin’s face begin to fall, “No matter what Pip, I’m always gonna be your friend ok?” She reached in to wipe the mud created earlier by the dust and the tears off of Pippin’s face.

Pippin looked up at Merry, eyes still wet and shining, and Merry had to fight against the urge to kiss both of those shining eyes right then and there. But that’d be weird. She couldn’t do that. That’d ruin everything, and she was almost an adult, she couldn’t be doing such impulsive things anymore. She began to pull herself away when instead Pippin closed the distance between them and kissed Merry full on the mouth. Merry was shocked for half a moment, but then “oh fuck it,” she thought, and kissed Pippin right back.

“I knew it!” Pippin crowed after they broke apart, while Merry was still trying to get her bearings.

“Knew what?” Merry gasped.

“Knew that you liked me of course!” Pippin said triumphantly.

“Knew… that I liked you? I mean.. of course I like you, why else would I hang out with you? And I mean.. that is…” Merry trailed off, but one look at Pippin’s smug expression brought her back to the important details. “If you really knew, then why’d it take you so long to say anything you scamp?!”

“Ok ok, so I didn’t know. And you were being all weird about being grown up and everything that I kind of thought maybe you thought you were too old for me or something dumb…”

“I don’t think that,” Merry said, grabbing Pippin’s hands. “I’m sorry I’ve been dumb.”

“And I’m sorry I didn’t say anything earlier,” Pippin said, smiling as she went to kiss Merry again. Merry let their lips mingle for a few more moments before breaking away.

“But I thought you were hungry?” she asked, half concerned, half hopeful that Pippin, like her, was no longer interested in afternoon tea or dinner or supper or any other meal for that matter.

“I can think of things I’d rather eat,” said Pippin as she raised her eyebrows suggestively and then laughed at herself.

“You vixen!” laughed Merry.

“Though there are my parents to worry about,” Pippin sat back in concern. Her indecision became almost comical as she looked up the bank and then back at Merry several times.

“Don’t worry about them,” Merry counselled, “If we’re not back by the time they get there Farmer Maggot will tell them we ran off into the forest. We’ll say we wanted to take a short-cut to visit Frodo. And after all,” she said with feigned innocence, “everybody knows that shortcuts lead to long delays.” Pippin smiled widely and kissed Merry all over again.


End file.
